Let us know about the etiquettes of speaking in Islam. It’s the mere 3-4 inches of lump of muscles called tongue; which has great power to human being, power of ORATION. Such a powerful organ; that if used effectively it has capability of controlling other people’s minds. So, People have ruled the world and hearts of people by using this lump of muscles efficiently. And the tongue contains no bones, yet it has power of breaking hearts and bone of others ( and some times your own , if used unwisely ).
Need of Learning Etiquettes of Speaking.
We humans have the best power of expression. But unless and until this expression is controlled, its use less. Controlling tongue while speaking is tricky but if left loose; can cause devastation to people around; enumerated below are Etiquettes of Speaking prescribed by Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala in Glorious Quran as:
-“Talk straight, to the point, without any ambiguity or deception.” [33:70]
The more you are precise and to the point, more is the worth of your speech. So, Avoid double meaning sentences and be clear.
-“Do not shout. Speak politely keeping your voice low.” [31:19]
A Believer is polite and soft in nature. This gives the listener a humble look, thus helping in creating a positive image even before you explain your subject.
-“Always speak the truth. Shun words that are deceitful and ostentatious.”[22:30]
The Prophet said:
“Woe to the one who talks to people and lies in order to make them laugh! Woe to him! And woe to him!” [Abu Daawood & Ahmad] .
This adds to your credibility, people would know by default you speak truth. You must be credible enough that no promise should be needed from you for assurance of any thing.
-“Do not confound truth with falsehood.” [2:42]
Again this can risk your credibility, which is crucial for if you want your message to be effective.
-“Say with your mouth what is in your heart.”[3:167]
Transparency is indeed an important point. No one would like to listen to a hypocrite.
-“Speak in a civilized manner in a language that is recognized by the society and is commonly used.”[4:5]
Your philosophical words and flowery phrases are useless if you cannot reach the understanding level of your audience. There is no point of speaking germ-en in front of a Spanish person.
-“When you voice an opinion, be just, even if it is against a relative.” [6:152]
Remember, writer of fate is ALLAH subhaana hua wa taala. No one can take your Rizq or your life, and neither can one insult you as ALLAH gives respect to whom HE wills.
-“Do not be a bragging boaster.” [31:18]
Allah dislikes arrogant and show off people. Bragging and boasting in your speech can create mental block between you and your listener.
-“Do not talk, listen or do anything vain.” [23:3, 28:55]
Islam explains its disapproval of the meaningless talks.Because A vain talker, on account of the weak co-ordination between his thought and his tongue; blurts out whatever comes on his tongue. Sometimes he says something which places him in danger, and he ruins his future. It is clear that the more one talks; the more one commits mistakes.
-“Choose best words to speak and say them in the best possible way.” [17:53,2:83]
Etiquette’s of Speaking:
Including the above mentioned points; this best possible way can include various etiquette’s of Speaking:
- Begin by greeting people.
- Giving an introduction before the coming to the main subject.
- Speaking at a slow pace.
- Emphasizing important things by repeating them.
- Facing the speaker.
- Allowing elders/ most knowledgeable to speak first.
- Do not cut others while they are speaking.
The objective of addressing people is to convey certain points or ideas. So, one must talk slowly enough for them to be able to grasp and understand what is being conveyed. Once, while ‘Aa’ishah was praying; she overheard a man hurriedly narrating a statement of the Messenger of Allaah . Afterwards
“Had I finished (praying) before he left, I would have rebuked him for his haste. The Prophet would never speak quickly when addressing people. He would speak slowly and in a manner that would enable anyone listening to understand what he was saying.”
Some words or phrases may prove difficult to grasp or understand the first time. and it is therefore recommended to repeat them; in order to facilitate comprehension. Anas reported:
“Whenever the Prophet(PBUH) said something; he would repeat his words thrice; so that the meanings would be fully understood.” [Al-Bukhaari & Muslim]
“The speech of the Messenger of Allaah was so clear that all those who listened to it would easily understand.”